Like a DUCK

When I started working where I am currently employed, almost a year ago, I immediately butted up against an extremely narcissistic coworker, a youngish Millennial who is what would most aptly be described as “The Mean Girl” – the one in junior high that everyone avoids, the bully. I sought refuge with my closest next-in-line

Sober Healing

For many of us, drinking booze has been a way to avoid feeling the intensity of the wounds, traumas, scars, hurts, and pain we endured throughout our lives. When we are triggered by the stress of the day, something someone may have said or done, perhaps the feeling of overwhelm, we drink alcohol so we

Pandemic and Addiction

Today I want to share this enlightening article. My addiction to alcohol climbed to a dangerous level during the pandemic, resulting in debilitating anxiety and depression. I KNOW I am not alone. Are you drinking more since March? https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.nytimes.com/2020/05/26/health/coronavirus-alcohol-addiction.amp.html

Learning not to Scream

As I have mentioned previously, I am a highly sensitive person, and someone who holds very high standards for myself and others. When I feel I am treated unfairly, it is incredibly difficult for me to restrain myself. I give all of myself to whatever I do, even if it is emptying disgusting, overflowing trash,

“Sensitive”

As long as I can remember, I have been told I am “too sensitive”. I have heard all too often that I need to develop a tougher skin, to not wear my heart on my sleeve. Maybe that’s why I became addicted to alcohol. Self medicating with booze is a very accepted way to tame

The wake up call

My days feel almost magical lately, especially my mornings. I bliss out during my sacred time, and that powerful energy stays with me throughout the day. My energy is strong, but at the end of my work days at the winery, 9 hour days filled with nearly 5 miles of back and forth steps and

Pissed OFF

I’m pissed. I had a tender conversation with a colleague in the wine industry last night. She was in the depth of anguish caused by the negative impact of the Booze Bitch, stuck in the horrific mix of anxiety, despair, and depression. I so vividly remember feeling defeated and defenseless in the war against the

Healing Addiction

Day 54. Let’s talk about addiction. How we got there, and why. And what we can do about it. Consider how many forms of addiction exist in our society. There are the obvious, common addictions such as drugs (like alcohol), yes, but think about all the other forms of addiction we practice. The array of

The Struggle

Day 37 Alcohol Free. I did not realize the extent of the sense of loss and grief/ discomfort I would experience throughout this alcohol free journey. I had not yet learned that letting go of a steady (albeit highly dysfunctional) companion would feel so odd. Not just hard, not just sad, nor merely lonely- but

The Breakup

…a letter to my “Ex” Dear Alcohol, Over three decades of loyalty to you and now I see those years were filled with lies, deception, grief and despair. You came wrapped in pretty packaging, The Temptress. I thought being a wine connoisseur and so steeped in your culture and romance meant I could enjoy you